Author: evgeniapimzin

Thursday, 4 December 2025

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Writing some of the scenes in my next manuscript is stirring up a great deal of emotion. I draw from my own life, and yet it is not my life I am writing about. It feels like walking into a haunted house expecting ghosts — but instead, it is the walls that begin to speak, whispering their deepest secrets from a bygone era, the voices of those who once inhabited the rooms, the hearts that once filled the spaces.

These are beautiful souls with human stories. None of them lived the life they yearned for. I feel protective of all of them, and yet I cannot protect them — they must stand on their own within the lives they created.

Tuesday, 2 December 2025

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I have been quiet these past weeks. Not out of avoidance, but because something inside me was rearranging itself. I began my second manuscript two months ago, but I set it aside when I realised the sound of it wasn’t true. The words were coming from my hands, but not from my core. It was as if a different melody was playing inside me – one I couldn’t yet translate onto the page.

And then, without warning, it arrived.

The idea burst open in my mind like a small firework – bright, gorgeous, impossible to ignore. Suddenly the rhythm was clear, the voice unmistakable, and the words spilled out faster than my fingers could keep up. It felt exquisite.

Moments like this remind me that creativity has its own seasons, its own hidden clocks. Nothing can be forced. I am not behind or slow or doing anything wrong. I am exactly where I am meant to be. The work waits patiently until I am aligned enough to receive it. And when the moment comes, it rushes in – whole, alive, and ready to be written.

The Roots of Self-Respect

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I remember being a child and wanting whatever fad swept through school. My father would always ask, “If everyone jumped into the fire, would you?”
Of course I wouldn’t – logic told me fire burns.
But as I grew older, the simplicity of that logic met reality.

Do people deserve respect when they do not respect me?

Intangible matters have a way of blurring what once felt obvious. Being disrespected hurt – it embarrassed me, made me feel small, insignificant, even ashamed. Like everyone else, I thrived when I was treated with dignity.

But I also noticed something unexpected: I did not feel stronger, safer, or better about myself when I disrespected those who had disrespected me. It felt hollow. It felt beneath me.

Somewhere along the way I learned that a strong sense of self is the shield against disrespect. It allowed me to remain respectful regardless of the other person, regardless of the room I stood in, regardless of how sharp or gifted I was with words.

There is enormous power in simply looking at someone with quiet, candid pity – not hostility –  and staying grounded in myself. Sometimes the most dignified act is to walk away without letting their chaos infiltrate my inner world.

When I mastered this, I realised how deeply empowering it was. It affected others more than any noise, rage, or rudeness could. More importantly, it freed me. I was no longer at the mercy of other people’s emotional storms. I became separate from their flaws, their turmoil, their behaviour – and that separateness became my truest form of self-respect.

And in that space, I discovered a powerful truth:
When you no longer need to react to disrespect, you naturally begin to respect everyone – not because they deserve it, but because you do.
Your calm becomes a mirror. Their behaviour no longer belongs to you.

Disrespecting others, to me, is a sign that somewhere inside, I have forgotten how to respect myself.

~ Evgenia Pimżin

Monday, 24 November 2025

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Today I had a late lunch with a dear friend at the Warran Glen Nursery Café in Warrandyte. Melbourne gifted us a beautiful sunny day, and it felt like the perfect place to slow down and simply enjoy the moment.

There is something special about Warran Glen – a peacefulness that settles the mind. The pond, the ducklings resting on its banks, the small bridges leading you through the gardens and nursery… all of it whispers calm. I felt my whole being relax into the setting, finding inspiration in the gentle colours and quiet life surrounding me.

When Your Heart Needs A Whisper

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Dear Child,

as adult as you feel, remember:

Shhhhhhh

Shhhhhhhh

Let me whisper this to your soul.

EVERYTHING will be okay.

Right now, you feel numb, detached, unable to imagine joy.

These feelings consume you.

Breathe their immense force deliberately into you.

Shhhhhh.

Shhhhhh

Gently put those feelings down onto the floor.

Now listen to your heartbeat,

Place your hand on your heart.

Feel yourself breathing

Sit still.

Sit very very still.

And close your eyes.

Let everything that comes up, flow through you.

Feel its ebb and flow.

See, my dear friend – today you got through it.

Today was a good day.

Because you got through it.

Hugs to you

All my love,

~ Evgenia Pimżin

Learning To Love From a Place of Power

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Love is one of the most difficult and complex states to master because it is an emotion, an action, and a choice.

For me, it was especially challenging to learn how to operate from a position of love. I did not grow up in a loving environment, and the only “template” I had was fawning – the behaviour that once kept me safe because it earned attention. My now-husband was the first to show me that this was not love. It was a defence response. When he gently asked me to stop, I felt exposed and even defensive. Yet he preferred that real version of me – the version I was not acquainted with yet.

His manner of relating forced me to dig deep, to develop the skills I had never been taught, to make conscious choices that built trust and intimacy rather than fear and appeasement.

It took me a very long time – decades – to learn how to come from love when interacting, how to stay in love in daily life, and how to return to love regardless of my moods or the chaos within me. Through that process, I met all the parts of myself: my insecurities, my false beliefs, my internal map, my fragile sense of self, my lack of boundaries, and my fear of stepping into my own power.

I kept myself small. I was nice to everyone, even when they treated me poorly. I feared the word “no,” both saying it and hearing it. And deep inside, I wanted my husband to be my knight in shining armour.

But my husband – a strong, grounded alpha male – believed that my life was mine to lead. He saw no point in managing my daily choices or defending me at every turn. That, he believed, was my job. And so, he loved me steadfastly while I learned to build a life where I was in charge: my boundaries, my decisions, my voice, my self-respect.

This was his love in action – quiet, constant, unwavering. He made sure I was never in need and that I felt protected as the woman he honoured and built a life with.

Meanwhile, I was on a long learning curve: how to return to love again and again, how to reveal myself slowly, how to let others reveal themselves in turn, how to give love without emptying myself, and how to receive it without shrinking.

And then, one day, something in me went AHA. A whole new world opened. Suddenly I was the main actor in my own life, surrounded by people who aligned with who I was becoming. I saw how bountiful life truly is – and I was overwhelmed that I had lived so long without seeing it.

I now know that coming from a position of love makes me feel rich, powerful, and grounded – because love has always been the foundation of life.

Now, I return to love as my home base. It is a daily discipline, yes, but also a choice — because, in truth, it is where I feel safest and most alive.

~ Evgenia Pimżin

When Giving Becomes Madness

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Do not fight for people who do not choose you —
whether family or friend.
Do not keep trying harder and harder,
hoping they will see your worth,
your big heart,
your beautiful soul.

Do not grieve the loss you never actually had.
Do not sit with the endless “why?”, “why?”, “why?”,
questioning your worth,
your soul, their heart.

Who watches another give, give, give
and accepts the take, take, take,
yet values so little of that person’s time?
Who accepts the handouts, but returns little of value in return?
Who feels offended and insulted
when suddenly the giver stops giving?

You have stepped into the madness of relationships
that inhabit a long pause in the sentence of connection —
a pause paid for by your hands, not theirs.

And now, two choices lie before you —
not tomorrow, not next week, but now.

Continue what you are doing,
but do not complain, do not grieve, do not sulk.

Or stop.
Stop the madness and choose to finally have your own back —
with love,
with self-respect,
and with the clear intention of building your future
on your own terms.

But you cannot have it both ways.
They have shown you that already.

~ Evgenia Pimżin

Are You Lying To Your Soul?

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Relationships are complex atoms – made of many subatomic parts – but the forces that govern them are deeply personal. Behind every person is their own history, their own pathway of experiences, beliefs, thoughts, passions and triggers.

At the heart of relationships, whether intimate or not, one core question must be asked: “What will I tolerate? And what will I not?” Until you can answer those two questions with absolute clarity – not based on hope or potential – you will simply go round in circles.

People are, in truth, very predictable.
It is you and I, with our soft hearts, who have allowed too much for too long.

Because we live with big hearts, we think that if we are good enough, do enough, love deeply enough, focus on their good moments and their small flashes of appreciation, we will somehow be rewarded with a good life.

Faulse, my dear friend.
Completely faulse.

Unless a person’s behaviour truly changes, unless they actively seek the skills they need to heal and to do better, their words that they will change are merely manipulation.

And I will tell you the kindest truth you may ever hear:
You can choose to hope that they will one day look at your beautiful face with love pouring from their every pore.
But then, I fear, you cannot complain.

Because if you keep entering a hungry lion’s cage,
you will be bitten – again and again and again.

So, I wrap my arms around your soul,
and ask you to think long,
think earnestly,
and honestly.

Ask yourself, “Am I lying to my soul?”

Do not rush to answer this question.
But do not take too long.
Because your future is – and always will be – your concern alone.

~ Evgenia Pimżin

On Rising Quietly

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Dear Child,

as grown as you are, remember –

You will not always feel certain.
There will be mornings when the light feels strange,

and the night feels foreign.


You’ll wonder if you’ve taken a wrong turn now

or whether you had deceived yourself

and you had been on this road for a long time?

You will ask yourself, “Why did I not get off earlier?”

And I will tell you why.

You were not ready.

You had not accepted the learning yet.

And so, when you are left with your quiet thoughts

when self-doubt consumes you,

when you stab yourself with a thousand accusatory thoughts.

STOP.

Stop NOW.

You do not need this further negative clout.
whispering all the ways you could have done it better.

Do not mistake this moment for failure.
It is only the soul’s way of asking you to pause.
Rest your soul.

Be kind to your heart.

Connect with what you need

You have walked through too many storms
to doubt the sturdiness of your own feet now.
You know how to start over –

You know this with certainty.

Rise,

gracefully, quietly, without permission.
That is where your strength lies.

Not in getting everything right

but in knowing when you need to rise.


The ability to rise again

is actually the lesson in disguise.

So, do not announce your climb.

Take a deep breath.


And tend to yourself.
with your tender heart.

All my love,
— Evgenia Pimżin

When Sadness Comes To Visit

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Dear Child,

as adult as you feel, remember :

Sometimes, you will feel sad and know why.
Other times, you will feel sad and have no idea why.
Sit with the sadness, as you do with joy.
Let it speak to you.

You see – they are both on the same road.
Only one feels lost and is asking for direction.
The other waits patiently, beckoning the lost one to join.

Sadness reveals where you are not.
It points toward where you need to go.
But you cannot travel forward
until you treat every emotion as a friend.

Let each reveal its delicacy, its winding ways, its truth.
Become familiar with the music of sadness –
breathe in its heavy sighs.

If you do not know what to do,
trust this: you are simply being asked to turn
in the opposite direction –
toward possibility, toward choice.

And in time, this too will pass.
Nothing stays the same once you move.
Because it was only a street —
not your permanent address.

Name it.
Move.
Let it go.

You were only visiting.
Now, it’s time to go.

All my love,

~ Evgenia Pimżin

When the Past Won’t Apologize

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Dear child,

As adult as you feel, remember :

Let me be the one to tell you, life is not fair.

You did not deserve to be treated cruelly.
You deserved respect and dignity.
You deserved to feel safe and secure.
You are owed an apology.

But you did not get it.
And so, what are you going to do now?
Look to the past?
Struggle to be present?
Miss out on creating a future?

That is a waste of your precious time.

You need time to heal – I hear you say.
This is wise.

Focus on your healing, not the past.
Distract your mind by focusing on the now.

See that flower? describe it to your mind.
Watch your mind follow your lead.

Show it a passing bird.
Listen for its music.
Look for a stunning tree.
Touch its leaves.
Let your hand trace its bark.
Close your eyes and feel
its patterns under your palm.

Dig deep to show your mind
what you want it to notice.
Practice this daily –
like a muscle in training.

Yes, you will still have your pity parties.
That’s fine. Just time them.
Don’t live there.

Take the reins in your own hands –
and start to ride.

All my love,

~ Evgenia Pimżin

21 November 2025

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Today I’ve been sorting, refining, and categorizing my writings from the last thirty years for my website. It’s fascinating to reread the shifting landscape of my mind – the years of confusion, the years of clarity; the seasons where I didn’t know where to place my pain, and the gentle periods of letting it go.

At the heart of it all, I can see myself slowly gaining life skills, precision in thought, and a deeper trust in my own inner compass – shaped by self-knowledge, personal beliefs, and the path my soul was determined to walk.

In revisiting these old haunts, I feel proud of who I have become. Proud that I stayed the course. Proud that I learned to own my life on my own terms and quietly triumphed.

The Peace that Belongs to You

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Forgiving isn’t excusing.

It is uncoupling yourself from the person or event that keeps pulling you backward.
You don’t forgive because they deserve peace.
You forgive because you do.

You can still have boundaries.
You can still remember what happened.
But you stop offering your inner life as a battleground for someone else’s choices.

~ Evgenia Pimżin

Grieve instead of Hate

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Dear Child,

as grown as you are, remember –

It is not wrong to hate. It is human.
You were pained, betrayed, treated unjustly. The feeling itself is not the sin — it is the signal. It tells you that something sacred was violated. But if you let that hatred take root for too long, it becomes your captor, not your protector.

Those walls you built around your heart may have kept the pain out, but they have also kept you in. You mistake protection for peace, silence for strength, and the weight of your armour for safety. Without realising it, you begin living inside the very cage that hatred built.

Ask yourself gently — who is hurting you now? Who is betraying you now? The wound was theirs to give, but the keeping of it has become yours. The battle ended long ago, yet you still wake as if the war never stopped.

Grieve instead of hate. Let the sorrow move through you until it softens. It was never hatred that filled your heart – only the feelings you locked away. Set them free, and keep only the wisdom.

Life is not a battleground, my dear one. It is a classroom for the soul, where even the hardest lessons eventually reveal themselves as disguised forms of grace.

Step out of the cage. The sky still remembers how to hold you.
And when you rise, you will remember how to be free.

All my love,
~ Evgenia Pimżin

When My Guard Finally Rested

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Hate used to visit my heart, but at some point, I realized it was not meant to live there.

It came came as my defender when I was hurt – when betrayal cut too deep, when I felt unseen in my pain. Butor a time, hate felt powerful and purposeful. But what began as armour soon hardened into eternal rage and isolation.

One day I woke up and realized I didn’t need to fight.

There was no war, even if my body hadn’t realised it yet.

Those who wronged me had faded into their own stories, but my heart still kept guard at a door no one was trying to enter.

It was time to let that guard rest.
And allow the tears to come instead of the rage.
Grieve the dream that died, the love that never came, the apology that never arrived.
Letting grief in, did hurt, – yes – but it flowed finally through me when I allowed it.

Hatred on the other hand had stayed far too long, like an unwanted guest, until I showed it the door.

Forgiveness I learned is not forgetting.

I will never forget.

Forgiveness was uncoupling myself from the weight that no longer belonged to my present.

So, I learned boundaries instead.

I learned self-respect.

Self-honour.

Self-integrity.

I learned to surround myself with people who built me up.

I let others reveal themselves first.

I let them earn my trust slowly.

Above all, I learned to always have my own back – unapologetically.

I learned to protect my peace, but with an open hand, not a closed fist.

I carried this burden long enough. In hindsight, far too long.
I lay it down purposely and deliberately, everyday,
because there is more ahead of me – a life waiting to be lived – than the life that no longer exists.

And I refuse to waste anymore of my precious time what was never mine to hold.

~ Evgenia Pimżin

Align Yourself with Your Rhythm

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Dear Child,

as grown as you are, remember –

You are not running late in your own life.

The world may try to convince you that you should be somewhere else by now – more accomplished, more certain, more defined – but the truth is, you are exactly where your soul needs you to be.

Life is not a race; it is a rhythm, and yours moves to a quieter tempo that cannot be rushed.

There are seasons that bloom loudly, with visible progress and recognition, and others that unfold in stillness, where growth happens silently beneath the surface.

Do not mistake stillness for failure or slowness for loss. The roots that deepen in silence are the ones that hold strongest when the winds of life arrive. Some of your greatest transformations will happen unseen, and that does not make them any less real.

When envy or impatience creeps in, breathe and ask yourself whose pace you are trying to match. Whose race are you running?

The world will measure your worth by speed, success, and applause, but your soul knows better. It measures in truth, in integrity, and in the quiet moments when you choose not to give up on yourself.

You can begin again at any hour, in any year, with whatever pieces remain in your hands. Readiness is not a prerequisite for growth – courage is.

The moment you stop waiting for certainty, life begins to unfold around you. Trust that your rhythm is not a delay; it is alignment in disguise.

You do not need to chase what is meant for you. The right opportunities, the right people, the right moments, the right callings – will always recognise your peace and find you when you are ready to receive them.

So, rest in that truth. Keep moving forward, keep creating your life.

Live by your time. Move gently. Your life is not behind; it is becoming, in its own perfect way.

All my love,
— Evgenia Pimżin

The Quiet Rebellion of Happiness

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I spent a long time collecting reasons not to be happy – and all of them were valid.

I was hurt, overlooked, mistreated, misunderstood.

I carried what others should have carried. They should have known better, been accountable, changed their ways. I remembering trying to speak to them about their behaviour, or confided in someone who brushed off my experience.

Sometimes, I kept their secrets to protect a loved one, or endured their silences because I refused to play their game. I built walls not because I wanted to, but because the world taught me early that softness was unsafe.

There came to an impasse, where I had decide that the past no longer defined the quality of my present. Happiness , I decided, was not a reward for those who had an easy story – it was an act of rebellion for those like me.

It was a quiet, deliberate choice to stop rehearsing my pain and begin reclaiming my life on my terms, because deep down, I already knew what I knew.

Choosing happiness did not erase what happened. It did not excuse cruelty or dismiss my wounds. It simply meant I no longer was willing to make those wounds – or the people who caused them – my mental and emotional home. I can honour my pain without worshipping it. I can remember without reliving.

And yes, the world, kept insisting that happiness was naïve, that in choosing happiness, I ignored depth, injustice, reality and that I was a victim.

But now I know this – happiness, when chosen consciously, is the deepest form of wisdom.

It is not the absence of awareness; it is the presence of perspective. It is what happened when I stopped waiting for others to change and began building a life that nourishes my spirit today, on my terms.

So I released the need to make every scar my identity.

I allowed myself to have joy even if my story is unfinished, even if my heart still trembled when I trusted again. I refuse to believe that I am betraying my past when I choose to live fully.

I am redeeming my life. I am telling the past, I am done with being your prisoner.

And in that space, I learned happiness is neither always laughter or sunlight.

Sometimes it’s a quiet evening where I breath steady again.

Sometimes it’s choosing to let something go without bitterness.

Sometimes it’s simply waking up and saying, “I am still here, and that is enough for today.”

I have learned that the choice to be happy is not about pretending.

It is about returning to myself, and to the life that is still waiting beyond my pain.

I meet it daily noe because it has been waiting patiently for me.

~ Evgenia Pimżin

Rooted in Worth

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Dear Child,
as grown as you are, remember —

There will be times when your kindness feels misplaced in a world that rewards sharpness and celebrates noise. You will look around and wonder why cruelty seems to win, why indifference rises faster than grace. You may even question whether your gentleness belongs here at all.

But I want you to understand this: your softness was never weakness. It was the language of your soul trying to stay intact in a world that had forgotten its own. You were never meant to match its pace or mirror its values. You were meant to remain rooted in your worth – unshaken, steady, and quietly radiant.

The world will hand out prizes for appearances, popularity, and performance. Let them. Those prizes fade as quickly as they’re received, etched only in memory and shallow time. Your reward lies elsewhere – in how deeply you’ve touched life with your warmth, in the peace that follows you when your words align with your heart.

So stop measuring yourself by the applause of others. The day you understand that your worth was never tied to their approval is the day you step into your full soul. You were not born to win the world; you were born to understand it, to navigate through it with discernment and compassion – and to protect the part of you that still feels deeply.

Never trade your tenderness for acceptance. Never shrink to fit into smaller hearts. You are not here to compete for admiration, but to contribute presence, truth, and quiet strength.

Stay rooted in that knowing, dear one. It will carry you further than any prize the world could offer.

All my love,
~ Evgenia Pimżin

Let Go Of Worn Out Memories

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Dear Child,

as adult as you feel, remember:

Come sit by me and

rest in my love.

Know you are not alone.

Your experiences are part of the human journey

that is what makes it tragic,

jaded

and so very predictable.

Those memories – the ones that defined you for so long,

that shaped your choices,

your perceptions of self –

you misinterpreted them.

You accepted the lie instead of the truth.

You are precious. You always were.

You are loved. You always have been.

You are strong. You know it.

You are beautiful. You’ve always shone.

So, as we sit together,

take your beliefs in your hand.

Refine them.

See them through the eyes of insight.

You forgot to weight your memories,

against the health of the other –

their emotional, mental, spiritual state.

Unless you factor that in,

your memories lies.

So, let go of those worn-out memories

with truth and an eagle’s gaze.

Rise above the human noise,

see the lesson, the growth,

the quiet expansion of your being.

I am here – always.

Come, sit by me, dear child,

and let go.

Give yourself permission, to live the life

you have always deserved.

All my love,

~ Evgenia Pimżin